Defying Judgement
In a candid and engaging speech, Amber (Year 12) turned an everyday incident into a powerful lesson about resilience, self-belief, and personal growth.
Using her humorous and somewhat mortifying experience of falling in a crowded bus, Amber encouraged her peers to shake off embarrassment and judgement, and turn their mistakes into stepping stones towards success.
Each week, our student leaders share their insights with their peers in Assembly.
This morning, I was on a busy bus minding my own business, having a lovely morning, might I add. I was texting my mum, slightly nervous about this speech, when a white Fiat decided to cut in front of the bus, causing the driver to make a rather abrupt stop. I was focused on my mother's supportive messages when I went absolutely flying from nearly the back of the bus up to the flight of stairs in the middle. If you thought this situation couldn’t get any worse, you would be wrong. A tall man was standing in front of me and during my fall, my face actually made contact with the higher end of the back of his legs, if you know what I mean. The entire back half of the bus proceeded to stare in horror as I sat slumped on my knees, my bag entangled with my legs and my face bright red (bearing in mind that many 韩国AV and Shore students witnessed this). If this isn’t the most epic failure you have ever heard, I do not know what is. For the rest of the bus ride, I held on to two nearby poles for dear life and believe I will have the bruises as a reminder.
I consider this rather humbling experience to be a valuable situation from which I can learn. I could easily blow it out of proportion, thinking everyone on that bus was judging me thoroughly, and I could vow that I would never catch the 230 bus again. Unfortunately, I also have a rather poor sense of direction and don’t know of any other buses that go to that destination, so that isn’t a great option either. Anyway, as I sat on the bus floor, I faced a decision: I could either let the witnesses shape my interpretation of the incident and spend the rest of the day embarrassed out of my mind, or I could take control of my own perspective and learn from the experience. Ultimately, your response to a situation is up to you. Only you see the world through your own eyes. So what happens if you alter that view? The answer is – success.
Success is something we all aspire to achieve. In fact, it is probably the most desirable thing in the world. It can both unify a community or create division. But why is it that only a few have the privilege of celebrating success? Because success does not come without learning from one’s mistakes and altering one’s worldview.
As Dr Scott often reminds us, we are each embroiled in our own personal battles, which we often feel we cannot control. But we must recognise that no purpose lies in stressing over that which we cannot change. I cannot stop the strangers on that bus from quietly giggling, and I cannot change the awkward silence that followed said event. But I can make the most of it and treat it as a learning experience.
In our modern age, especially as women, we tend to take on the faults of others and sometimes we may give in to saying sorry more times than we should. We actively externalise and underestimate the power of inward focus.
Additionally, we often don’t truly understand that we only have one life and inevitably, the only person that we can depend on, is ourselves. So why waste time worrying about the judgement of others? What if every day you put 70%, 90%, or 100% effort into compartmentalising the opinions of others and prioritising yourself? What do you think would happen?
We can treat this inward focus like a muscle, working at it, strengthening it until it can withstand anything – until it is strong enough to even hold on to the bus handles. Allow this muscle to support you in the most challenging of times so that you may approach life armed with the knowledge that success is often a mosaic of mistakes, beautifully assembled.
As Bernard Brauch said, “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
Now, more than ever, you must believe in yourself, invest in your growth, and face every challenge with courage and determination.
Thank you.